


I JUST WANT TO BE-PLEASE LET ME

by lila_luscious1



Category: Grey's Anatomy, Station 19 (TV)
Genre: Anger, Angst, F/F, F/M, Love and Marriage, M/M, Redemption
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-12
Updated: 2020-05-12
Packaged: 2021-03-02 18:20:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 774
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24141205
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lila_luscious1/pseuds/lila_luscious1
Relationships: Andrea 'Andy" Herrera Sullivan/Robert Sullivan, Maya Bishop/Carina DeLuca, Meredith Grey/Andrew DeLuca, Victoria Hughes Ripley /Lucas Ripley
Comments: 7
Kudos: 28





	I JUST WANT TO BE-PLEASE LET ME

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Patty_Parker60](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Patty_Parker60/gifts), [joli_camarillo](https://archiveofourown.org/users/joli_camarillo/gifts), [carolina_beckerj](https://archiveofourown.org/users/carolina_beckerj/gifts), [julrenda](https://archiveofourown.org/users/julrenda/gifts), [LeesyLovesBathenaAndVicley](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LeesyLovesBathenaAndVicley/gifts), [Bacner](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bacner/gifts).



A month and counting, and Carina De Luca has yet to return a call, respond  
to a text. Maya Bishop, co-Captain of Station 19, pushes through the regret,  
and the guilt, and the longing and 'powers through', as her Father taught her-  
continues to excel in a male-oriented and dominated profession. The brass  
is taking notice, and she should be on top of the world: except for the off  
time, when the three bedroom house echoes with the sound of her loneliness.  
The worst part is that the way that she drove Carina away: returning from her  
tryst with Jack Gibson, and expecting the Italian to have already left, a mini  
version of their earlier disagreement follows:

CARINA: Maya, if you are trying to make me angry, I have to say that you  
are succeeding...

MAYA: You want to be angry? Be angry about this: I fucked Jack less than an  
hour ago...there! Be angry about that!

Her back to the bedroom door she had stormed through and then slammed,  
the sound of Carina's mournful sobbing could be heard. Did she go back  
out and apologize? NO. After thirty minutes or so, Carina had quietly gathered  
her things and just as quietly slipped out the front door. Did she call later that  
night, to talk things over? NO. She went to bed, and didn't sleep a wink. The  
next day, she must have left twenty voice mails, and just as many texts. ALL  
go unanswered. And so she works her shifts, avoiding Jack as much as possible.  
She avoids Andy Herrera as well (that same night, the night of Gibson-redux, her  
BEST FRIEND had come to her, distraught and needing to talk, and she had shut her  
down); _CAPTAIN MY CAPTAIN_ !

The one time she's forced to be one on one with Gibson is for a verbal warning to  
cease hounding Herrera, tying to get her to end her marriage. "What you're doing  
is inappropriate as well as DANGEROUS: her HUSBAND offices TWO DOORS away  
from mine! HIS bet friend, by the way, is Chief Ripley...if yo're trying to get fired, that's  
one thing...but Sullivan isn't going to stand for it, so I'm telling you now: get it together,  
Gibson. This is a verbal-don't make me go to written...are we clear?"

"CAPTAIN MY CAPTAIN...speaking of inappropriate, though...what was that a month  
ago? Just CLARIFYING..."

" _FOCUS_ , stay out of Herrera's personal life. She can marry who she wants, and  
since she didn't ask your opinion before she said 'I DO', that indicates that she was obviously  
dis-interested in your opinion...cease and desist, for your own good. On what happened between  
YOU and I-yes, inappropriate and won't be repeated." Then, in a friendlier tone, she says "Increase  
your sessions with Dr. Diane. LISTEN TO HER. Andy's GONE, Jack. OK?"

"Yeah...OK."

//////////////////////////////////////////////////

She calls Carina. And calls. And phones her office. And waits for her outside of Grey Sloan. She  
even gets hold of and calls Her brother Andrew, who's fighting his own demons, and not much  
help. She shows up at Carina's office, insisting that the receptionist let her in. Through a crack in  
the door, the words that leave her sleepless, and adrift, for the next few weeks:

"GO AWAY, MAYA...the sound of your voice, the SIGHT of you...makes me nauseous. Stop calling  
me, please and don't text. Leave Andrew out of this. I don't want to call Chief Ripley, but I will.  
be well."

But she ISN'T WELL...not at all. Vic pulls her aside once and tells her that she's no longer  
welcome at their usual 'after shift at the bar' soire..."You're a little out of control, Maya. Really.  
Lucas is really conscious of how the department is viewed on and of the clock. And Sweetie...  
you have to get yourself under control. We've had to drag you home passed out at least twice.  
You threw a bottle at Chance to weeks ago...he wanted to ban you, but we convinced him not to.  
MAYA: you gotta go see Dr. Diane."

"Yeah, okay, I will" she'd mumbled...did she go? NO. She found a different bar, a lesbian hang-out  
called STILLETTOS. She drowns her pain with tequila, and mindless sex. Multiple partners, and some  
kinkier stuff: after one shift, she finds herself the focus (with another woman) of an all woman gang-  
bang (that entire three days is a blur, and she 'calls-off' the next shift). The morning that she finds her  
house filled with passed out, drugged-out, strange women (NONE of whom she recognizes), she calls Dr.  
Diane Lewis for an appointment.


End file.
